Thursday, July 29, 2010

The Parenting Breakthrough



The Parenting Breakthrough

By: Merrilee Browne Boyack

Her Website: http://www.boyacks.com/Merrilee/

This is a parenting book available through Deseret Book and I thought I would post a review because overall I thought it was really good. If you are looking for ways to teach your children to work and accomplish goals such as saving for a mission and college, this may be the book for you.

The premise is centered around "The Plan"- a list of accomplishments beginning at age 3 that you would like your children to master- everything from baking cakes from scratch to learning the difference between mutual funds and CD's. Basically, each year the children are required to learn life skills necessary for conquering the world.

I am quite sold on "The Plan." I really like it as an overall strategy to teaching children to work. I also like her take on allowances and dealing with money, which she goes into detail in the book.

Like most parenting books, however, there were parts I did not like/agree with. It felt like towards the end she was getting rather preachy, and that annoyed me. Also, some of her methods I would definitely not use- for example, she teaches that if your child does not make their bed or finish their morning chores, you take them out of school until they do finish. Being an educator, I want my children to know that education is vitally important, and so I believe they should be punished in some other way- having after school priveledges taken away, etc. Love and Logic has some great solutions for those kind of problems and I like their discipline program much better than hers (she does openly admit her book is NOT a discipline/behavior book, and I found that often when she touched upon discipline I preferred the Love and Logic methods much better).

I think in most self-help books there are parts to take away and parts that just don't quite work. I found this to be the case with this book as well. A very good book with some excellent, practical skills, and some parts that I would not use.

Overall: 4 out of 5.

5 comments:

JaneGS said...

>she teaches that if your child does not make their bed or finish their morning chores, you take them out of school until they do finish.

That's the most appalling thing I've ever heard!

I like the idea of having a clear idea of what you would like your children to master, but with a 17-year old and two 15-year olds, I have had to come to terms with the fact that my interests and my kids' don't always align.

Interesting review, though, thanks.

L said...

Here here on aligning with my teens, or I mean, NOT aligning with them, as that is most often the case. grrrr. I do have a 4 year old though. Maybe there's hope for him..hahahahahahha. yeah right.

Christina!!! You're back! I should probably read more self help books, but I always end up feeling worse about myself, so I usually avoid them and their preachiness. Glad you got something out of it though.

Stephanie said...

I think I'll have to try "The Plan" (I feel like that should be accompanied by a thunderclap and evil laughter). Is it too late to start with my 7-year-old?

And I have to confess, I've heard of Love and Logic, but know little about it. Is there a book or website that you'd recommend to learn more about it?

Christina said...

Lula- I have a few books to review, it's just a matter of sitting down and actually doing it!!!

Stephanie- she does a good job of explaining how implementing it when the kids are older will still work, you basically just sit them down and say, "OK, we have been doing things this way, and now we're going to try this" kind of a thing. I'll be curious to see if you like it!!!

I have gotten several Love and Logic books, videos, and cassette tapes from the library. The authors are Jim Fay and Charles Fay. They also have a website www.loveandlogic.com and a daily radio show (which you can listen to on their website). So far, I haven't bought anything from them yet- but my kids are still young, so that might change! They do a lot of seminars, so I might eventually go to one of those. I just really like their philosophy. Basically, you let your kids make choices, and you let them feel the consequences of those choices. The theory- for example- is that if you let them get a bad grade on a project they forgot to do in the 2nd grade (rather than jumping in and finishing it yourself), then in 11th grade when it matters, they will know they need to get it done because they don't want that negative consequence (I don't know if that makes sense or not- sorry I am not explaining things very well!). Good luck! I am still pretty new at this parenting thing, so right now any advice is gold to me:)

Stephanie said...

Thanks, Christina! I will definitely look into Love and Logic as well as this book. I need all the help I can get... :)